Nigerian defender honours husband’s memory through the game
Just days before joining the Super Falcons, 27-year-old Nigerian footballer Blessing Illivieda was confronted with unimaginable grief. On May 23, her husband, Ibrahim Abiola, died suddenly following a brief illness.
“It was a shock,” Illivieda told BBC Sport Africa. “He was supposed to come watch me play. Instead, I got a call saying he was in the hospital. Two days later, he was gone.”
Abiola, a former youth international for Nigeria, had been one of her biggest supporters. The couple, who married in January 2023, shared a vision for Illivieda’s career. It was only her second call-up to the national team, and he had been eagerly anticipating her appearance in a friendly against Cameroon scheduled for June 3.
In the wake of his passing, Illivieda faced a difficult decision. After consulting with her mother and her husband’s family, she chose to report to camp. “Not everyone will understand,” she said. “But my mother told me to go and honour him. His sister said even if I cried forever, nothing would change. So I went.”
Illivieda, a defender and captain of Bayelsa Queens said her commitment never wavered. “People will always talk,” she said. “But I’m focused on turning my pain into purpose.”
Abiola and Illivieda had faced the common societal pressures of young marriage in many African communities, including the expectation to start a family shortly after their wedding. But he remained committed to her football career, encouraging her to pursue her dreams even when balancing the demands of marriage and sport became challenging.
“My husband wanted me to go farther than he ever did,” she said. “He believed in me completely.” That belief now fuels her. In many parts of Africa, widows are expected to observe extended mourning periods, often in seclusion.
Illivieda’s decision to continue playing, she said, is not a rejection of culture but a call for a broader understanding of grief. “God is my comforter,” she said. “And I find strength in the love my husband showed me.”
To other young widows facing similar expectations, her message is one of fortitude. “What you produce from your pain makes you a winner,” she said. “Your victory after sorrow is what truly matters.”
Just over a week before Abiola’s death, Illivieda helped Bayelsa Queens secure their second Nigeria Women’s Football League title. It was her second league crown with the team, capping one of the most intense and successful seasons of her career.
Despite her strong performances, Illivieda was not included in Nigeria’s final 26-player roster for the Women’s Africa Cup of Nations (WAFCON), which is held in Morocco. Still, she remains a staunch supporter of the Super Falcons.
“I’ll keep praying for the team,” she said. “We are the giants of African women’s football. We can do it again.” As the Super Falcons gear up for Africa’s premier tournament, Illivieda draws strength from her faith, cherished memories, and a steadfast commitment to the dreams she and her late husband once envisioned together.
Written by Kweku Sampson
This article is published by either a staff writer, an intern, or an editor of TheAfricanDream.net, based on editorial discretion.
